Currently Listening What's Left of Me By Nick Lachey see related

i was tagged by kim coleman.  THE RULES:  Each player of this game starts with 6 weird things about you.  People who get 'tagged' need to write a blog of their own 6 weird things as well as state the rules clearly. In the end, choose 6 people to be 'tagged' and list their names. Don't forget to leave a comment saying 'you've been tagged' and tell them to read your blog. 

that being said, i can't think of anyone besides kim who reads my xanga, so i'm just going to write about my 6 things that make me unique, quirky, and weird to some...and loveable to others...and admired by most...

1.  i sing to my computer screen when listening to music...or basically anytime i'm listening to music alone.  however, many roommates have walked in on my "serenading".

2.  i'm a neat freak, i hate dirty dishes sitting out, messy counters, stovetops, etc.  when i get upset, angry, or just really emotional, i clean.  but especially if i'm mad.  so...if you walk in and my kitchen looks extrememly clean, chances are i've had a tough day.

3.  i'm a defensive driver.  i yell at other drivers.  not that they can hear me, but i yell just the same.  it makes me feel better.  and i also throw my hands up when a driver does something stupid.  rush hour traffic is stressful!

4.   i have an extremely bad case of arachnophobia.  not joking.  hyperventilating, screaming, freezing up, and/or running at an extreme rate of speed tend to happen all at once.  it's quite a site to see, i'm sure.

5.  i have successfully fallen asleep in every single class that i took while in college, 5 years worth.  every class.  many multiple times.  even my pickleball class.  i have mastered the art of sleeping while sitting or standing up. 

6.  i cry at movies...ALL the time.  basically any and all disney movies...and pretty much anything else.  i'm also a war-movie buff.  i love the era-movies.  but i'm a sucker for a man w/boots, a cowboy hat, and a horse.

Currently Listening December, Piano Solos: 20th Anniversary Edition By George Winston see related

i'm always amazed how a vanilla latte or peppermint mocha from starbucks, no matter what time of day, makes me feel so good...but especially in the mornings.  yes i love coffee, but i'm picky.  if i'm going to spend money on my "liquid faith", as one of my pastors affectionately calls this marvelous drink, it's gotta be starbucks.  of course, there's the exceptional coconut coffee found only at dunkin' donuts. 

why is it that i love christmas music so much?  it makes me feel giddy and like a kid again.  i admit, i listen to delilah every night and the non-stop christmas music...for a month straight christmas music is always playing, whether in my truck, at work, or at home.  i feel bad for all the scrooges who hate this time of year.  how sad. 

and christmas is 11 days away.  good night, how did that happen?!  in my mind, it's still summer.  wasn't i supposed to have classes this semester, write papers, cram for ridiculous exams that would serve no other purpose other than contributing to a grade that would evidently have no influence on getting a great-paying job in the music industry??  oh yeah, i graduated.  done with all that.  surprisingly, i don't miss it.  i will never go back to school.  school and i, we weren't friends.  going to class, a fan i was not.  sleeping through a class, absolutely.  i could have majored in that.  it's true, college taught me much of what i know about life...yet most, if not all, was learned outside the classroom.  ironic. 

but i do miss belmont and life as i once knew it to be.  however, i certainly wouldn't trade anything for my regular, 9-5 job, being on salary, taking care of myself, paying my own bills, living in a townhouse, having my dog speck.  five years of college was worth it for this.  but i'm struggling trying to find my niche...there is a gap between college students and "adults".  i'm no longer a student, i guess i'm a young adult, i'm certainly single, probably a "business professional", but where do i fit?  in many ways, college was so much easier.  more often than not i feel alone...i don't want to "slip through the cracks".  i'm by no means artsy, and truthfully, turned off by it.  but college life is no longer relevant to me, either.  i'm single, so being around married couples is awkward.  (even though i love the feeling of "family".) 

as with everything else i've ever gone through, this difficult time will eventually pass, and while going through it, god is wanting to work things in me.  what those "things" are, i have no idea.  it sure is difficult to be patient and to continue trusting that god's ways are better than mine, that his timing is perfect, not mine.  in the moments i do feel alone, he has to remind me of the great friendships that i do have.  even though my schedule rarely "connects" with others, it just makes those times that much sweeter. 

but i'm going to enjoy my vanilla latte and allow the starbucks taste to linger.  i'll leave the christmas colored cup on my desk throughout today simply to make me smile each time i see it. 

Currently Listening What's Left of Me By Nick Lachey see related

meet speck...doesn't look 15, does he?!  he's so great...

Currently Listening Imagination By Bethany Dillon new see related

i don't like cold weather.  when the leaves begin to fall off trees, i tend to get a little sad...summer is over...another season gone.  what lies ahead is a cold, chilly winter with bear trees, cloudy days, shorter days.  i always miss summer.  sometimes i even cry as leaves float away in a chilly breeze.  where did summer go?  the last 5 months seem like such a blur.  i'm beyond asking god to help me understand why things happen as they do.  now my prayer is for his peace, comfort, and healing.  i still ask "why?"...but the answers almost seem irrelevant.  answers won't bring people back.  answers won't take away the ache and hurt. 

i like my schedule and routine.  i almost enjoy getting up at 6:15am every day to walk my dog...because for years i wanted a dog to walk, and now i have one.  so i appreciate watching the sun rise.  i no longer go home to an empty house, and there is always someone waiting for me at the door.  and he's excited to see me.  every day i'm amazed how god can use a dog to comfort and heal my hurts. 

i'm realizing that, although i don't understand god, i can know him...i know he is who he says he is...he can do what he says he can do.  i can find comfort in this. 

right now i'm finding out who i am...and it's a tough journey, lonely at times.  however, i know that god makes all things new.  he won't take something away without restoring that which is lost.  i don't know what that looks like right now, but i need to believe this.  i need to have hope, however difficult it may be.  in romans 4, against all hope, in hope abraham believed god would fulfill his promises.  he was strenthened by his faith, and his faith did not waver...because of this he was called righteous.  i want this kind of faith.  unchallenged faith is unchanged faith.  so i guess i can rejoice that i'm being challenged on a daily basis.  romans 5:3-5 says "so we rejoice in our sufferings because suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; character, hope."